You Would Be Stupid To Go On Reality TV

I’ve read a few articles about this now. Art Fag City gives the full details about how to apply. Bad At Sports calls it another addition to the  ”competitive-lineup-and-get-them-to-cry franchise”. Art Monitor says what I was thinking when I first heard about it being Sarah Jessica Parker’s production company behind it.

I now offer this advice to any artist reading this: It would be utterly stupid for you to go on an art-based reality TV show.

It will not help your career. At most, it may give one person a year in the limelight.

You will be ridiculed. Every tiny flaw you have will be blown up to immense proportions. A small falling out? World War 3. Struggling to articulate? You’re dumb as a sack of hammers. They don’t like your art? You are an complete failure who should give up and save the embarrassment.

You will never live it down. You be one of “those artists off the telly”. How do I know this? This is what happens in every single one. No exceptions. Have you noticed how few of “last years winners” there are? That because they’re too busy on the next series to give you the full attention.

For God’s sake, if you’re going to go on television, do it under your own terms. Don’t sell out your creativity to someone who isn’t going to give you anything back apart from a Baptism of Media. It’s like a regular baptism except you’re held under the water for months at a time.

You have been Warned.